I just had a pretty intense 24 hours. Started out yesterday when both kids refused to sleep at my mom’s place and decided it was way more fun to torment me instead. Then they got cranky due to a lack of sleep and started whining and fighting and not sleeping some more. Which got me cranky because there’s only so many times a person can yell LIE DOWN AND GO TO SLEEP NOW!

I thought they would be sufficiently tired when they got back and I would have a nice, relaxing evening. But Kirsten was apparently overstimulated and spent the night screaming till 4am, by which time, I was all OMG GO TO SLEEP WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME??

When I got up this morning after a 3-hour nap, I felt like a giant bag of crabs. Made into a crabby patty. I was way past my limit of yelling, cajoling, threatening, bribing and I just wanted to curl up in a corner and feel sorry for myself. I felt like I deserved the right to be crabby. Like if there was a Right To Be Crabby award for enduring hardship, I was sure I would have won the girl in this drama I once watched where she became blind, lost the love of her life and discovered she had cancer.

But I knew what I signed up for when I wanted to have kids. Days like these were inevitable and I should be thankful they are few and far between. I could sulk my day away and have another bad day or I could suck it up and be a mom. Which meant digging deep and finding that happy place so I could make my time with the kids worth it.

I wanted this, remember. I wanted this. Also, I clearly have issues with masochism.

We ended up playing pirates and soldiers all morning and they are finally down for what seems like a very long nap. And I didn’t even have to yell once today.