I’m convinced that parenting is one of the toughest jobs in the world, and I’m not saying this just so I can gain sympathy points for how awesome I am. In fact, I think I’ve got it pretty easy. All things considered, Tru is one of the easiest babies in the world to take care of, so I really don’t have anything to whine about. But I’ve got mad respect for parents who make it despite having life treat them unfairly.
We brought Tru to Ikea for a walk last night to add some finishing touches to the nursery before Kirsten’s arrival. While we were making the rounds checking out baby stuff, I happened to see a little girl who literally made me stop in my tracks and I almost teared standing there in the middle of Ikea. She was about 3 years old, with pigtails and the sweetest smile a girl could have. One hand was holding a stuffed toy and the other was firmly tucked in her daddy’s arm. Then I noticed that that arm ended slightly above the wrist, and she had no fingers on that hand.
It didn’t stop her from smiling and skipping around. If you didn’t pay attention, you probably wouldn’t even notice the arm. Just standing there looking at her, I felt like holding her in my arms and crying. I looked at Tru and it seemed so terribly unfair. Kids don’t deserve to be born handicapped and parents don’t deserve to have their hearts broken every day of their lives at the injustice of it all.
Honestly, I don’t know if I have the capacity to handle it if one of my kids were born with some form of imperfection. It’s the parent’s job to shower them with extra love and care to make up for it, but I’m not sure if I have that much love to give in the first place. I’d probably cry everyday.
I look at parents who’s kid has Down’s or a hole in their heart or paraplegic and they seem to have a special capacity to love more than the average person. With the medical advancements available to us, doctors can detect signs of abnormality within the first trimester and it’s so much easier to opt for the easy way out, to terminate the pregnancy and try again. But some parents choose to take the road less travelled, to have the child and love him despite of how tough it’s going to be.
For some, it’s a lifetime of heartache, sacrifice and worry. Weird stares, whispers, taunts and tough questions become a daily staple. And yet they find it within them to smile and keep on going.
If you’re a mother who has such an experience or know of someone like that, I’d love to hear your story and read about your journey. You can post your comments here with your web address here if you have one or just email me at my Contact Me page.
