side effects of motherhood

20 weeks, we’re halfway there

April 13, 2012

After what seemed like forever, I’ve finally clawed my way to the halfway mark of this third pregnancy, leaving me another 20 weeks to go.

In true second trimester fashion, the nasty pregnancy side effects like nausea and bloating have all abated and I’m about as close to enjoying the pregnancy as I can get. I am, however, watching the belly take on a life of its own despite my best efforts to keep the weight down. The husband says it’s like I’m not even trying after watching me decimate an entire box of durians but it’s the baby who made me do it, and I’ve already held back on finishing the second box.

I did a detailed scan of the baby at gynae yesterday and I’m glad to say that Finn is doing really well. They checked his head, nose bridge, lips, fingers, heart, kidney, blood flow and they seem to be all in order. For which we’re very thankful.

I’d like to post pictures of the baby bump but I’m now at the awkward stage where the baby could be easily confused with an unusually large dinner so maybe in the next trimester when it starts looking less like an extra box of durians and more like an actual baby.

So instead, here are some ultrasound scans of the baby’s side profile. If I have to guess, I’d say he looks like Kirsten, who by the way, has staked an early claim to the  baby.

Kirsten: Baby Finn is my baby right?

Me: Actually he’s my baby but I guess he can be yours too.

Kirsten: No, I’m your baby so baby Finn is mine!

Me: I’m the one giving birth to him, so technically, he’s mine.

Kirsten: You cannot have so many babies, you know. You need to share.

Me: Fine, you can have him but you’ll need to feed him and clean his poop. Good luck with that.

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stuff best described as not safe for parents

To hover or not to hover

April 12, 2012

I recently had a conversation with the husband about the hover hand phenomenon. If you haven’t heard about it before, go read about it here. Go on, I’ll wait.

So the big question is of course, is it more appropriate to hover or not to hover? Do you want to run the risk of being caught in a suggestive photograph by not hovering or try to absolve yourself from all responsibility but look like an idiot by pulling a hover hand move?

Ok, first of all, WRONG QUESTION.

Now, I consider myself a fairly progressive specimen of the female species and I don’t really have a problem seeing the husband in a photo with his hands on the shoulder of another girl. Oh wait, while we’re here, I should probably make it clear that the safe zone to be touching a woman who is not your wife is limited to the shoulder. Everything else below the shoulders and you’re in very dangerous territory.

So if hovering (or non-hovering) is not really the problem, what is?

1. Hotness. 

If you refer to the above chart, you’ll realize that the hotness scale works like an exponential curve. Feel free to rest your arm on any woman who looks like Tilda Swinton, or better yet, Margaret Thatcher. But if you so much as lay a pinkie on a Megan Fox equivalent, I’d recommend that you start digging your own grave on the way home.

2. Interest. 

The interest scale is a lot more straightforward. The level of interest you display is directly proportionate to how likely you are to be stabbed. Basically, more interest = more stabbing.

If you ever find yourself in a situation where you absolutely have to take a photo with a hot girl, at least try not to look like you’re enjoying it so much. We can smell your fear. I know it’s tough to look nonchalant when you’re in the vicinity of hotness, so if it helps, pretend like you’re casually standing next to a lamp post. Play it cool and then buy a tub of ice-cream and some flowers on your way home just in case.

What do you say, ladies? Would you want your guy to hover or not hover?

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Getting Floored No More

April 10, 2012

Advertorial

Interior design (or any kind of design, for that matter) is not one of our strengths, so when we bought our first home 5 years ago, we had no idea what to do with all that space or how to make it homely. Well ok, we did have some ideas but a lot of those ideas weren’t very practical so after all the renovation work was done, we realized that we had made some very amateur mistakes.

Like having a wooden kitchen table top. I like the look of a wooden finish but apparently it’s not very durable when it comes into contact with water, which happens all the time because it’s right next to the sink. Now I have to wipe up every drop of water from the counter top whenever it gets wet and that is a real pain.

And you know what else is a bad idea? Smooth bathroom tiles. When we went tile shopping, we wanted black tiles to create a mysterious, romantic hotel sort of feel.

It didn’t occur to us what a bad idea smooth toilet tiles is until we finished taking our inaugural shower in the new bathroom, stepped out onto the wet, smooth tiles and did a slow-motion naked-arm-flailing-try-not-to-fall routine. Over the years, we’ve had to do the same routine (some successful, others not so much) after every shower. On the bright side, we’ve developed a fantastic sense of balance.

When 3M offered to send over some anti-slip floor stickers, we figured it would be nice not to have to face the imminent threat of falling on our bare bottoms multiple times a day.

These 13cm x 13cm stickers come in a pack of 4 and there are a bunch of colorful kid-friendly designs to choose from. The application process was easy enough – just peel and stick on a clean, dry surface. It’s also been extremely durable and a breeze to clean. I just scrub over the stickers with my brush whenever I wash the bathroom and I haven’t had to deal with frayed edges or a loss of adhesion.

The best part is that they do the job they’re required to quite effectively, which is to prevent slips and falls. I can step out confidently after my shower and focus on perfecting my hair-flick like one of those shampoo commercials instead of having to worry about doing an unglamorous backflip.

The stickers can also be used in the kitchen, wash areas or common toilets – basically anywhere that gets wet and slippery.

Because we all know that not falling is always good.

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of 3M. All opinions and text are my own.

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