Always be my baby

One of the downsides of having multiple kids is that I don’t get to spend as much time as I’d like with each of them. And among all 3 kids, it’s baby Finn who has the least alone time with me.

With Truett and Kirsten, I was all they had so I was there for everything – the nappy changes, the songs, the baths, the feeds, the sleep struggles, the tantrums and all of the kisses. With Finn, I’ve had to spend more time at work and whatever time I have at home has to be split 3-ways. So that means less poopy diapers, less screaming fits and less epic food fights but also? Less baby snuggles. And if there’s one thing I need more than anything else, it’s those darn baby snuggles.

The husband knows that my mommy kryptonite is feeling like I haven’t been there enough for baby Finn. Plus with another one on the way, I feel terrible that this sweet, unassuming little third baby of mine is going to be sandwiched with even less mommy time.

Most days, the only time I get to spend alone with Finn is when I put him to bed at night. He drinks his milk snuggled in my arms and we’ll talk a little and sing a couple of songs and snuggle some more until he falls asleep. I live for these moments. Also recently, he does this thing where he pulls up my shirt, points to my gigantic belly, laughs his head off and says “BABY!” Sometimes, he’ll throw in a few raspberries blown for good measure.

So we were doing our bedtime routine earlier and as usual, I asked him “where’s baby?” Instead of pointing at my stomach, he pointed at himself and says “Baby. Finn Finn baby.” To make sure I got the message, he touched my nose and said “momma”, then pointed at himself again and said “baby.”

My heart melted everywhere as I held him and told him that he would always, always, always be my baby. He would be my baby and I’d forever be his momma.

And then he nuzzled his head into my arms and drifted off to sleep.