It’s no secret that I think girls are awesome. <<Okay, hang on, here’s a disclaimer for my boys who are reading this/will eventually read this: Mommy adores you and hand on my heart, I love you guys all the same, I promise.>>
But having a decent sample size of 3 boys and 2 girls, I’ve can definitively say that boys and girls are entirely different.
How different?
With girls, you’re basically getting an iPhone – gorgeous, sleek, well thought out, user friendly, pre-loaded with all the necessary apps – just have fun unboxing and you’re good to go.
With boys, you’re getting an unreleased beta version of the galaxy s7 – excellent potential, possibly a better processor, faster speed, more space, but unstable and very likely to set your house on fire. Boys are like incomplete downloads that glitch every now and then, and you have to constantly download patches to keep them stable.
Impulse control issues? Boys. Sensory issues? Boys. Difficulty expressing feels issues? Boys. Roughhousing until someone gets hurt issues? Boys. All manner of odd behavior issues? Boys. All of the epic meltdowns in my 9 years as a parent? Boys.
When I’m out with my boys, I have to be on high alert mode every microsecond because the chances of them destroying stuff at a store or getting lost or eating leftover food from tables is very high. Once, we were at a playground and there was a piece of half chewed/trodden on pandan cake on the floor. Baby Theo went straight for it and put it into his mouth. AND ATE IT. So these days, I also have to flying tackle food scraps out of his hands when we’re out.
Which is why I really enjoy these girl team outings with Kirsten and Hayley. We were out for a quick lunch last week and I was about to go buy our food with the baby in one arm like I usually do but Kirsten was like “don’t worry mom, I can watch the baby while you get the food.”
So I did. It was so relaxing to be able to carry food with both hands and not worry about destruction of public property while I was gone.
All moms have a superpower. It’s like gummy beary juice or Asterix’s magic potion. The moment you become a mom, you have access to a special ability, a turbo beast mode that lets you do things for your kids that you would normally never be able to do.
Backing it up a little, I was always fond of kids even before I had any of my own – I’d offer to babysit for friends, make googly eyes at random strangers’ offspring, volunteer to help at Sunday school every week – but it was always a play-for-a-while-and-give-it-back type of situation. Once the kids got grouchy or whiny or annoying, I’d be like “okayyy, play time is over, I think it’s time to hand you back to your mommy, here we go!!” and I’d return to doing whatever leisurely activity I fancied.
Then I had my own kids and everything changed. There was no one to hand off my grouchy, whiny babies to; and I didn’t want to either. I now had babies I wanted to spend every moment with, to clean their massive blowout poops, to hug them when they’re having a horrid day, and to sit with them all night when they’re unwell.
I’d fight a bear for them or step in front of a train to save them without even thinking twice, no question about it.
One of the hardest things to deal with as a new mom was the exhaustion. According to science, after a solid month without sleep + a screaming baby, you will lose your mind. And while it is true that I was 97% insane during those initial months of each of my 5 babies, I somehow managed to dig deep and power through. It would be 4am and after having gotten out of bed for 27 times that night, I’d take one look at my adorable baby and somehow I would find the strength to get up for round number 28 to hold her and whisper sweet nothings.
I’ve also gotten stronger after having kids. I’ve got all the gym time I need right here with these 5. I mean, who needs dumbells when I’m lifting 10kg weights for hours a day. Which is not to say that I’m Hercules because every time I’m carrying this baby, my brain is yelling at me to drop her so this sharp, shooting pain in my busted shoulder would stop. The husband is like “I don’t know how you can carry this baby all day, I can’t feel my arms after 20 minutes” and I’ll be like “yeah, but I’m brutally strong” but the truth is that it’s just sheer mommy willpower that intercepts the pain receptors in my brain and blocks it with images of this face. And how about those thighs? Can we just take a moment to marvel at those thunder thighs? Those thighs are legit.
There’s also the irresistible need to give them the best that I possibly can. When Truett was born, I started to measure the value of things by cans of formula. I’d look at a fancy new pair of shoes and decide not to buy it because this was 3 cans of formula for my baby. Yes, I did consider switching him to a cheaper formula but I couldn’t do it because suddenly, splurging on stuff for myself just didn’t matter so much anymore. I would mull over a $40 pair of jeans for weeks but think nothing about dropping $62 for a kg of Atlantic black cod for the kids.
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I think this is one of the reasons why we are fans of Pursoft products. Not only are they superior in quality (strong, yet soft and gentle), they get why moms do what we do and they help make the journey easier.
If you haven’t tried it, Pursoft 3ply tissue is thick and strong enough to clean up spills and messes, while the 100% virgin pulp ensures the softest touch with every use. Plus it’s free from optical brightening agents, making it suitable for infants.
How adorable is this new Chocolate Rain packaging? Featuring whimsical day and night designs, which fit nicely at home.
There’s now a new soft pack version of their facial boxes, which is compact and convenient for taking along when we’re out and about.
It’s great for using in the car – we have one within easy reach from the driver’s seat at all times, and one more next to the kids at the back. They call it their emergency stash corner.
Pursoft is offering free travel pack samples and an introductory offer price on the new Chocolate Rain Designs and soft packs for the entire month of May. Visit the website here to get the complimentary samples and head over to Fairprice Online for the special offer prices.
I’m trying to be more diligent about these snapshot posts because the moments just hang around for a bit and leave so quickly. In my day to day, all these minutes are floating by like little clouds of smoke and I try to catch each one and hold them in my hands a bit longer but I can’t catch them all and most of them get blown away like leaves in the wind and years later, all that’s left will be faded memories of these babies I used to have. When these kids are all grown up, I’m gonna need more than a few faded memories, is what I’m saying.
10 month old baby Hayley is like fluffy cotton candy sprinkled with popping candy bits. She’s mostly sweet and gentle and all delightful babyness. And she’s got the loveliest baby dimples, which are like the finishing touches on that adorable face. I used to be just ok with dimples but now, I can definitely see the appeal.
Most of the time, her idea of conflict resolution is to be sweet and docile, which is strangely effective in a disarming sort of way. All the other kids are like “ok ok whatever you like baby Hayley, kor kor and jie jie will give you.”
Unless there are beverages involved, then all bets are off. When she’s in the presence of any sort of drinks, she turns into an angry flailing monster who will destroy everything standing in her way. It doesn’t matter what the drinks are either – milo, milk tea, juice, yakult, soursop with sour plum, soya bean milk – she wants in on all of it.
She will have it in a mug
She will have it on a rug
She will have it on a chair
She will have it anywhere.
Nothing makes her quite as happy as when she’s sipping on a delicious beverage treat.
She still sleeps like an infant at night, in that she naps for 2-3 hours a stretch, then wakes up and demands to be babied back to sleep. During the day, she doesn’t sleep at all. She’ll take a 30 minute snooze at noon, then stays awake for the rest of the day till bedtime at 8pm. What kind of baby does this? The kind that delights in the misery of her momma, I suppose.
She’s also got the most bizarre sleep quirks. Instead of holding a blanket or soft toy like normal babies, she needs to hold her toes in a full stretch like one of those baby Chinese acrobats while feeding, which is a most ridiculous move because once she drifts off, she will involuntarily let go of her foot, causing her to twitch violently and wake up. I keep telling her that this is not sustainable and very poorly thought through but does she listen? No.
Developmentally, she’s more of a freestyler. At this age, all the other kids were proficient crawlers and they could pull themselves up to a standing position. But not baby Hayley because she does not care for such milestones. She can sit up and crawl very slowly with tremendous effort (and grunting), but as for standing, she refuses to even try. Zero effort. She just enjoys lying down and rolling around, and I totally get it. If I could, I’d spend all my time lying around too. All this standing and walking is so much effort and not even that enjoyable.
The best part about 10 months is that this is gradually getting easier. In a year or so, I’ll be done with this demanding newborn stage forever and I’m not sure if I’m ready for that. While I’m looking forward to sleeping a full night the way humans are intended to, I’m really, really going to miss this chubby baby face.
