Monthly Archives

June 2011

Father Inc, precious moments

Daddies are delicious

June 17, 2011

Is it just me or does Father’s Day seem to be less of a big deal? It’s like while women (who are mothers) are often defined by their role as a mother, men are usually defined by their fancy jobs and the size of their um, cars. For most men, being a father is relegated to an afterthought, like that guy over there is an Emeritus Minister, drives a Bentley and BTW, has 3 kids.

These days though, we’re seeing the rise of the Superdad, who take on their fair share of parenting duties, and then some. Like I always say, they’re practically moms, minus the breastfeeding. And today’s post will be all about the husband, whose Superdad status has reached legendary proportions.

Ask any woman and they’ll tell you that there’s nothing more smokin’ hot than a man who adores his kids and is adored right back by them. It’s exactly why guys who bring along a puppy for a walk in the park are 83% more likely to pick up a hot chick than those who fly solo.

Being Father’s Day and all, it seemed like a good time to make a list of my all time favorite daddy moments.

1. Dogwalking at East Coast.

On a hotness scale, guys who bring a dog to the park have a +25 points advantage, guys who bring kids to the park have a +50 points advantage and guys who bring a dog and kids to the park have a whopping +100 points advantage. That’s a guaranteed fly ball-out-of-the-park home run.

2. Sitting on the shoulders of giants.

This is a classic daddy move. Women are just not ergonomically designed to carry kids on their shoulders – I do this for 2 seconds and my neck feels like it’s about to fall off. We carry them close to our boobs for snuggling but daddies are just right for that added height boost.

3. Matchy matchy outfits.

I know how much guys hate doing the matchy matchy outfits thing because “it’s so girly and gross”. I had to order these tees from Threadless and make them wear the exact same tops on the same day. Too cute for words.

4. Being a pretend unicorn.

Again, something that falls squarely in the daddy’s domain. My stomach muscles just aren’t defined enough to withstand this sort of abuse. Good thing there’s daddy to take one for the team and offer the unicorn riding services.

5. Baby kisses.

This makes my heart melt into the shape of a Precious Moments figurine. Ok, inside joke. But this is definitely my absolute favoritest moment of all.

Happy Father’s Day, sweetheart.

by
coolest kids ever, the breast things in life are free, unqualified parenting tips

The Vector Face – Oh yeah!

June 16, 2011

Recently, the kids have been watching a lot of Despicable Me. There’s this evil villain called Vector, who’s like the most annoyingly useless villain in the world, exactly the sort I like. And Jason Segel (Marshall from HIMYM) was the perfect voiceover for the character – equal parts annoying and likable.

In fact, the kids like him so much they’ve made up a game called the Vector Face. Ok back up a little. First, this is the Vector face. They go into hysterical giggling fits whenever it reaches this scene.

So the game works like this. We take turns to randomly shout “VECTOR FACE” throughout the day and everyone has to do this.

Did I mention that I’m the one who gets the most fun out of this whole exercise? When they’re fighting over toys or throwing a hissy fit, I go “VECTOR FACE” and bam, problem solved. Let’s see how long this lasts.

by
Kidspeak

Stuck it, mommy

June 14, 2011

So here’s an update on the duck and sleep situation, neither of which is going particularly well. The duck hunt is still proving to be as elusive as ever, because apparently bright yellow furry ducks that can’t quack are at the brink of extinction. Experts are blaming it on itchy-fingered toddlers who keep chucking these ducks out of strollers.

As the days wear on, baby girl is slowly coming to terms with the fact that she’s not going to be seeing duck duck again, and has (reluctantly) agreed to consider making 2 new friends in the form of a ladybug and a bear. She’s not sure which one she likes better so she’s hanging on to both for now.

As for the sleeping, they’re now playing a game of who lasts longer not-falling-asleep-while-being-confined-to-bed and the prize is the sheer satisfaction of pwning mommy.

Much of the game now involves them taking turns to ask me questions and me trying not to answer them.

Kirsten: Mommy, remember we went swimming so fun?

Me: mmph *non-committal grunt*

Kirsten: Did u have fun mommy?

Me: mmphhhh *slightly longer non committal grunt*

Kirsten: Mommy you like to go swimming with me?

Me: Ok yes, I do. But no more talking. Close your eyes.

*brief pause*

Tru: Mommy I think it’s going to rain.

Me: mmph *non-committal grunt*

Tru: You see, it’s very dark. Is it raining mommy?

Me: No it’s not. I will let you know when its raining. I’m serious, go to sleep.

*brief pause*

Kirsten: Mommy where’s my ladybug?

Me: It’s right there, underneath your butt.

Kirsten: OHH here… where’s my bear bear?

Me: Look, it’s here. Right next to your ladybug.

Kirsten: How about my duck duck? My duck duck LOST IT?? (she’s recently taken to adding “it” to all her verbs, like “help, my shoe stuck it” or “oh no, my cornflakes drop it”)

Me: You don’t say. If you don’t lie down, I’m going to be the one losing it.

by
picture perfect

Special only because it was so ordinary.

June 13, 2011

Just like a rainy Saturday calls for a cup of hot chocolate and some snuggle time under the covers, a sunny Sunday calls for bubble blowers and a picnic at the Botanics.

On picnic Sundays (and basically any other day), our responsibilities are pretty clear. The husband does the crazy running with the bubble thingy and I do the chilling out under the shade. Occasionally, I also help out with the motivation bit by calling out for him to run faster.

With Kirsten turning 2 in a couple of weeks, the kids are at an optimum age to max out the enjoyment factor on these family outings. When they were younger, they used to get grouchy if it was too hot, too humid, too sticky, too dirty, too hungry and we would be spending most of the time trying to make them feel comfortable.

Now it’s like “FOOD? WHO NEEDS FOOD? LOOK THERE ARE BUBBLES!” Which makes life a lot easier and so much more fun.

These Sundays are extra special to me because at some point in their lives, they’re not going to want to spend their Sunday mornings running around chasing bubbles with us. I’m hoping it’s later than sooner but when it happens, I want to know I’ve given them enough baby hugs and blown enough bubbles and soaked up every moment spent with them.

When they’re off with their super cool friends doing whatever cool kids do in 15 years, it’s going to be a lot easier to let them go knowing that I made the most out of all the time I had with them.

It was one of those Sundays that’s special simply because it was so ordinary. Exactly the kind I want to remember.

by
Kidspeak

Sleep training: A head banging experience

June 10, 2011

As far as sleep training is concerned, the kids have been regressing over the past couple of months. For a very brief spell, we had a good thing going – put them down, say goodnight and then walk out.

Then it started with a “I want mommy to stay 5 minutes” and became “Mommy can pat me please” which turned into “Mommy must sit here while I climb around for 2 hours”. For the past couple of months, their routine has evolved to having me sit on a couch in between their beds till they fall asleep.

Granted, it’s fairly nonintrusive. I get to sit there and do my stuff on the laptop. From time to time, I have to say things like “LIE DOWN NOW” and “STOP CLIMBING” and “KNOCKING YOUR HEAD IS NOT FUNNY, JUST STOP IT”.

After struggling for 2 hours to put them to bed without success yesterday, I decided it was time to start their hardcore training program. Which basically involves me leaving the room and holding the door shut from the outside. I was hoping that they would whine a little, then give up and drag their little feet back to bed.

As I stood outside waiting for the sweet, sweet sound of remorseful whining, I heard this instead.

Truett: Ok I tell you what, let’s play toys!

Kirsten: OH LET’S PLAY TOYS!!

Truett: Mommy will stand outside so we can play toys and later she will come back.

Me: Hey, no I won’t. If you guys don’t lie down, I’m not coming back in.

Truett: Mei mei, listen to me. We just play toys a while then later we sleep.

*The sound of me banging my head against the wall outside their room*

25 minutes later, I’m still standing outside their room. It’s like I’m the one going through the hardcore training program. This is me after 25 minutes of head-banging.

Kirsten: I want mommy, I don’t want to play toys anymore.

Truett: Don’t worry, mommy is just outside. It’s going to be ok.

Kirsten: It’s going to be ok, kor kor. We can play toys.

Kids: 1, Mommy: 0

I clearly need a new strategy.

On to other news, I’m now blogging for Outlet Singapore, the daily deal coupon site. For once, I’m actually going to have a (semi) proper job doing something I love, which is blogging.

Pop by for some drool-worthy reviews, bizarrely awesome facts, insightful interviews, and exciting giveaways that you don’t want to miss.

by
stuff best described as not safe for parents

MISSING: Have you seen this duck blankie?

June 9, 2011

For the first 6 months of her life, Kirsten had a best friend called Kiki. They loved each other like best friends did and spent many happy moments together.

And then one day, I lost her (the friend, not Kirsten). She was real upset and cried herself to sleep for many nights.

We searched everywhere for a new best friend but it was just not the same. Too furry, too pink, too thick, not fluffy enough. Eventually, she settled on a new friend and we all heaved a sigh of relief because things were good again.

Just to be safe, we even went out to buy 4 more of those new friends as backups. We would have bought more if not for the fact that we seemed to have bought the last 5 bright yellow Goldbug duck blankies in the entire Singapore.

Over the past year and a half, we lost 4 of them. And last week, we lost the 5th one. I know, like who loses 5 blankies right?

Well, apparently, I do.

I’m now offering a reward of $19.95, a pack of gummies and a very nice email for anyone who is able to find this duck.

by
unqualified parenting tips

Preparing for the toddler apocalypse

June 7, 2011

Kids and meltdowns are like bees and honey. Or popcorn and movies. Or Spongebob and Patrick. They go together and you don’t get one without the other.

And every parent’s greatest dilemma is how to deal with those meltdowns. Should you cave and give them whatever they want for a get-out-of-jail-free-pass or stand your ground and brace yourself for the toddler apocalypse?

Giving in to their demands can be a quick solution but when the demand is for blueberries handpicked from a pack of Post’s Blueberry Morning (without that speck of cereal, mom) and arranged in the shape of Mickey Mouse’s head, the meltdown seems like the lesser of two evils.

Still, it’s often a tough call.

Here’s a chart to help you deal with meltdowns more effectively (click to enlarge).

by